What I live for is him
by TheLittleLillith
Summary: The thoughts of a first time valet going out into the ring with the man she loves... Raven.


I blame this tidbit on a friend of mine who recently got me re-addicted to wrestling. ... jerk... anyways I have a few obsessions at the moment, Raven being one of the most prominent at the moment. So sit back and enjoy and thanks for reading.

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This is what he lived for. And now this is what I lived for.

The sweat pouring down from your face as the lights unrelentingly pounded down upon you. Hundreds of fans screaming, chanting and those few boos that are so loud it reverberates through your chest and you can feel it all the way through your body. The floor shaking from hundreds of feet stomping and jumping making it hard to remain standing. Signs with funny, derogatory words and quite a few marriage proposals, those were the best.

Her heart pounded, her palms sweat, and her knees shook. Tonight was the night. Her first appearance. Although she was only a valet she had every intention of helping him if he needed it. There was a rumor going around that Bobby Dreamer was going to do everything in his power to stop him from winning tonight. She wiped her palms on her ripped jeans, the loose strands of fabric clinging to the moisture. Her hands travelled upwards tightening the plaid shirt he had given her that was around her waist. He said that if she was going ringside with him tonight she would need something to keep her grounded, then he removed his shirt and pulled her close wrapping it around her waist and tied it tight. He was right, she needed something to keep her grounded while he was in the ring holding his own, getting hurt, while she could only sit back and watch. His scent was embedded in those layers of fabric and it was her only comfort while his blood was being spilled. Her black tank top seemed to get tighter with the thought of his blood on the ring floor. It happened so often he said he was used to it but she could never get used to the deep red dripping, the nausea that soon followed and the dread that filled her every time it happened. No, she would never be used to it. Looking down she saw her newly trimmed hair. When Zybisco had decided to let her valet for him he refused to let her in front of the camera without a makeover. He sent her directly to makeup and they completely reinvented her look to mirror his. Her once long dark brown tresses had been clear cutted into a shoulder length choppy monster piece. Don't get her wrong she liked it but it was a change that she would have to get used to. When he had seen it he was a little hesitant about it too, him being the one who had told her to grow out her hair. But he supported her anyways, he always does.

This was it another couple of minutes and she would be out there in front of everyone. She was worried, not about the fans, or the cameras, or even making an idiot of herself. No, she was worried about letting him down. If Tommy Dreamer was going to interfere tonight would she be able to hold him off? If he couldn't help her when she was in danger because of his match would she be able to protect herself from Dreamer. If she couldn't hold off Dreamer and he did interfere would he lose his match? Would she let him down?

All the thoughts in her head were blown away when a heavy hand came down on her shoulder. Startles, she looked up to see him. Almost two feet taller than her, his long brown hair rested upon his shoulders, covering half of his handsome face. His dark eyes looked down into her Jade green eyes, softening like they always did when they looked at her. Stubble reined over the lower portion of his face, but the mouth hidden there slowly melted into a small smile. The overwhelming scent of leather took over her senses as he stepped closer to her petite form. His leather jacket rubbed against her bare arm sending tingles up and down her body. The torn jeans that matched her own covered large black boots and were covered by another of his plaid shirts wrapped around his waist. He turned her towards him and ran both of his hands up and down her upper arms sending her body into a fit of shivers and goosebumps. He looked down at her and she smiled trying to hide the nervousness that she knew he could see in her eyes. His face turned into a concerned look and she knew she had been caught.

"Whats wrong?", he said. His voice rang through her ears. That soft voice that she loved and so many feared the voice that could be calm, angry, insane, loving, passionate, sad, scared and so many more.

"It's nothing", she replied looking down at her feet that were scraping against the floor in her nervous state of mind.

"Don't give me that bullshit", he replied with a smile as he lifted her chin to look in her eyes, " Jaiden what's wrong babe? Are you nervous? You know I'm gonna be right there with you and I won't let anything happen to you. And don't worry the fans are gonna love you aand if they don't, I'll make 'em see reason for you babe."

"I am worried, but not for me, for you", she said, grabbing a hold of his hands. She looked down at their joined hands, hers so small being swallowed by his massive ones that have both comforted her and impassioned her so many times. Then her hands began to travel. First up his large arms that have kept her safe from so many demons, across his broad shoulders, down his chiseled chest, across his abdomen and finally around his waist and back, pulling herself closer to him, to feel his warmth and comfort. Her head rested against his chest and her eyes drifted close, the sound of his heartbeat lulling her into a peace that she only felt when with him. She felt his large arms wrap her in his embrace and she felt completely at peace.

"Listen", he said, the sound reverberating through his chest, " I know that your worried about Tommy Dreamer interfering tonight, and I want you to know that if he tries to pull anything and ends up hurting you I will make his life a living hell from which he will never wake. This is a big match tonight, but all I want you to worry about is keeping yourself safe, do you understand?"

She looked up at the man she had come to respect, know and love. " I can't promise that because if Dreamer tries to hurt you I will do everything in my power to keep him away from you and the match. If I get hurt along the way I'll be able to handle it. But if he were to get in the ring and team up with your competitor and hurt you I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I'm not worried about getting hurt, I'm worried about letting you down.". A solitary tear slipped from her eye. His face softened even more and his hand came up and wiped the tear from her soft cheek.

"Please babe don't cry, you know I hate it when you cry. Listen, you could never let me down. The fact that you are willing to put yourself in harms way just to protect me makes me so proud, worried for your safety, but proud. You do your best out there tonight and the is no way you could ever let me down." he said.

She looked up tears in her eyes at the kindest words she had ever heard from the man who everyone believes should be in a straight jacket. She leaned up and meet his lips with hers. In the kiss she poured all the passion and love she felt for this man. As the kiss went on it got more passionate and rough, his arms sliding further down her body and hers going up around his neck, pulling herself closer to him so that there was no room left between their two bodies. Things were beginning to get pretty hot when a cough interrupted them. The two jumped apart, startled by the interruption. To their right stood Jeff Hardy, his competition for the night. Jeff looked at the both of them and smiled, then walked towards him and offered his hand. "Good luck tonight man", said Jeff. He looked at him, judging him then stuck out his hand and shook the Hardy's hand without saying anything, just a simple nod of his head. Jeff walked further towards the gorilla position as he was to be the first to walk down the ramp. She looked back up at him and gave him one last swift kiss then grabbed his hand in hers and walked hand in hand towards the gorilla.

'Alright this is it. Stay calm stay focused. He's right here with you and he always will be. '

Jeff had been announced and his music was going full swing and he ran down the ramp doing his usual display. She looked up at him to see that he was looking back down at her and she smiled, knowing everything was going to be ok. The loud voice of the announcer once again came out over the speakers as Jeff's music died down. This was it.

"And his competetor! RAVEN! and his valet for the evening JAIDEN "JJ" JANVIER!."

Raven looked down at his girl

"... Let's do this..."

Then the two of them walked down the ramp hand in hand and disappeared into the brightness of the stage lights.


End file.
